Lords of Olympus Update: The Gorilla Was Real

Here's another update of my Lords of Olympus campaign.  As always, it's not written by me, but by one of my players (Aetos' player, so keep that in mind). I've had to add a few edits to details that Aetos' player seems to have missed:

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Helena: Helena allied herself with with Lenny the cannibal, the Hippomagus, and Toilette,Goddess of …Toilettes to find the boxes left by Selene, Goddess of the Moon, to find who her real father is.

She went to the tower of babel, and after some infighting between multiple bands, she took their boxes. Then she moved towards an earth on the Newport festival in 1965, when Bob Dylan went electric. This box, thankfully, was much less cryptic than the other ones.When they went to the festival, they listened to the song “Hard rains gonna fall” which had in it’s lyrics the same people and situations she had met on her epic quest. She then proceeded to search for Bob Dylan and read his mind, seeing that the one who inspired this song was Apollo himself.Asking Selene why the hell she sent her on such a goose chase just to know that it was Apollo, she said that Helena was an abandoned child, one that Apollo was forced to abandon, and that she shouldn’t try to find out who was her mother. Helena then parted with her new friends to find Apollo.

Fito: Fito ‘s character went for a trip to Hades, but had a few stops. He tried contacting Gaia, and through his immense luck, he actually managed to do so.He told Gaia that he wanted to stop his father Poseidon from hunting down the Kraken, her own son. She accepted his help and granted him Kraken speaking powers. With a lot of luck and time, Fito managed to obtain a lot of gems and interchangeable items in various worlds and recruited a technological ship which can move between worlds with all and crew, to follow and try to tame the Kraken. He also managed to convince Elon musk of a bet, that he would tell him everything if he managed to get to Atlantis riding the Kraken. He found a smaller Kraken, then convinced him to take him towards the biggest one there is, their God. As he moved in the submarine through multiple worlds, he managed to see the Kraken face to face, and convince him that he was willing to dethrone Poseidon and hand Triton to him as a kidnappee, in exchange for him taking him to the underworld so he could show his might. The Kraken accepted and Fito bet with Poseidon that he could “own” the Kraken if he captured him first. Poseidon accepted, and Fito went with the already-convinced Kraken to the Underworld, impressing Hecate, Hades, and everyone that he met on the way. (RPGPundit Note: the author is omitting that he actually nearly caused a huge mess when he arrived, uninvited, with The Kraken, to the sea of Oceanus right by the Elysian Isle, and is now under 'house arrest' in Hades' Palace).

Paneb: Paneb decided to look for his mother, Louise Huston, on a radical feminist commune in a parallel modern Earth. His brother had initially gone with him, but they'd parted ways. Accompanied by Hermes, he lost him as he had an incident with Korean tourists and the Egyptian police. He managed to be rescued by Hermes and located Frank, who had in turn located their mother's commune in California. 

(RPGPundit Note: the author misses a lot that happened here, including that Paneb got into a fight with Frank, who he can't stand, and this brought police to the scene, and caused them to get separated again)

When Paneb talked with her directly, revealing himself to be the son of Hades and Louise, he told her he would wish to stay for a night. The commune voted that he could, only for a night, even though he is a man, but Paneb asked why he couldn’t stay with Hermes, arguing that…he was his couple?... they told him that he was a man, even though they were gay, and Paneb said that they had just…assumed his gender…? Of course, the radfems decided to kick both out.

(RPGPundit Note: for the record, Paneb and Hermes are not actually a couple. Paneb lied about that to try to gain sympathy from the radfems but that went very badly for him, because they're non-intersectional aging boomers... also he missed the part that Frank and Paneb's mom had told them not to come see her because there was a "dangerous gorilla in the forest", and they all assumed she was just making really dumb excuses to avoid the sons she'd abandoned... but it turned out that there really was a dangerous Undead Gorilla in the forest and the two brothers and Hermes had to kill it in a pretty tough fight)

Corey: Going back to Hera, Corey tried finding out what was inside the mysterious writings they found on the desolate battlefield where a God single-handedly took out 100,000 people for the “primordial sword”. She told Corey and Ares that they should go to Thanatos, who would likely be able to see what happened to these people, and that Morpheus, her ally, should be able to decipher the contents of the text. They went on Ares’s Quaddriga, beating Nike on the race to the underworld, and meeting Morpheus, his daugthers Apophenia & Paredolia (Paneb’s friends from Hecate’s school of wizardry), Hypnos, Thanatos and Hecate.

(RPGpundit Note: Corey also encountered Fito arriving with the Kraken, and got Apophenia to contact Ares for help. Ares came racing in with Quadriga, illegally summoning it from the other side of the River Styx, which has apparently gotten him into a diplomatic kerfuffle)

Hudson: Hudson tried talking with Hephasteus to build a super inter real computer to obtain more information for finding out who are “the chosen one’s”. Talking with Prometheus about the prophecy, he learned that there is a super computer named WOTAN in one of the modern earths. He went with Hephasteus and edited it, making it a super computer capable of connecting to the internet of 100 universes, and almost hellbent on destroying humanity, but managed to…kind of keep him under control? kinda?...

Arrit: Arrit and Dyonisus got shit drunk, and met with the Robot Bolt-1, son of Bolt-0, who wanted to take his father out of tartarus, who was unjustly thrown in by Paneb's false accusations at Hecate’s school of magic. They also allied themselves with Pan, the Goat god of Arcadia, a fat lawyer and a sick fucking tiger. Neat.
They asked Zeus very nicely to let him go, and he issued a decree that Hades must liberate Bolt-0 from Tartarus. Zeus decided to have Aetos accompany them, and Aetos managed to have them come with him on Nike’s chariot, the official chariot of Zeus. On the way, they met with Ares and lost a race to the underworld (even thought they threw the lawyer to the Quaddrigga, falling to his death shouting "I regret nothing!"), and Nike’s chariot was badly damaged by Ares’s attacks. 

Arrit and everyone rested at the entrance to the underworld, and Dyonisus saw fit to use this moment to try to initiate Arrit’s metamorphosis by changing them both into the berserker Primordial form. Aetos and Nike tried to stop them, but a mysterious ego blast made all 4 of them suddenly enter primordial form and lose consciousness. Arrit landed in Pablo Escobar’s Colombia, where she rode some hippopotamus for a while and did some amazing coke.

Aetos: Aetos sent one of his clones to formerly apologize to Hestia for the death of one of her servants. He also gifted to her another trusted servant, Antigona. He behaved very formally and gained Hestia’s respect and trust. He also tried dialogue with Zeus to have himself start a closer diplomatic relationship between them, knowing the importance of alliances during this time of possible youth rebellion. Zeus used this in his favor to send Aetos along with Arrit and Dyonisus to liberate Bolt-0 and kind of shove it in Hades’s face.When he woke up from being in primordial form from Arrit’s encounter, he used his multiple bodies to plead for Athena’s aid in rescuing Arrit. He also came back from whatever farm world he found himself on getting licked by goats to help Nike repair the chariot. Having no chance of finding either Arrit or Dyonysus, they had to wait.

Will Aetos completely lose the rest of his mind to the nightmare of being near Arrit Peanutbutter?Will Hudson make the new final boss of the game? Will Selene ask for 24 more boxes for telling Helena her pet goldfish name?

Only fate truly knows….