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Wednesday 3 August 2016

You Know Your DCC Players Are REALLY Into Your Game When...

My players spend considerable amount of their time between DCC sessions, talking about their DCC sessions.

We have a little Facebook group, which was intended to serve as just a way to warn me or each other if someone couldn't come or would be late, or we had to change the starting time, or practical things like that.
But as the DCC campaign became more intense, and more insane, it became a place to talk about the DCC game.

So here is an archive of the the conversations in the last little while. Names have been changed to protect the incredibly guilty.  Enjoy!


Ropework:
Lets try to finish the quest so I can get my patron :'(

Pundit:
I'll be curious to see who you get.

Fishman:
The king of Elfland!

Chu:
Lord of Flesh, Obviously.
Or Alan Moore.

Ackbasha:
Yes

---

Bill:
15 more xp to lvl 7 ??

Fishman:
No man should have that much power!


Bill:
Said no man ever
Akbasha is almost 5 too
4 or 5?

Ackbasha:
5

Bill:
Akbasha y Bill genocidas extraordinair

Fishman:
it is at this point we abandon any semblance of being anything else than an evil party.
I mean, I don't know who we were trying to deceive.
But ourselves.
And not even that, in Ackbasha's case.
The only thing left is Ackbasha saying "I am become Death, the world-fucker"

----



Bill:
Hey guys, I can't make it this Sunday, got to take my brother to the airport, and it fall right in the middle of the afternoon



Fishman:
That sucks. Bill is the heart of the party. And by heart I mean balls.
But not in a "courage-y" way.


Bill:
And by balls you mean asshole


Fishman:
No, that's Ack'Basha.
And by Asshole I mean brains.
But mostly asshole.
But on the subject. If (Bill) can't make it, it might be a good idea to skip this one and wait for the next to resume. Still, my opinion, I'll do whatever the DM decides. The DM that is overworked, and would really benefit of a free day...


Bill:
Are you a DM union rep?

Fishman:
Let's just say I'm familiar with the plight of the DM.
We have been opressed for too long!


Chu:
I am ok with not doing it next time because, Right now Bill is our compass, Not our moral compass because that was lost long ago, but an actual compass to the place we were going to go.


----
Chu:
In the end we really needed looshas arcane might

Bill:
How many died?

Ackbasha:
Not enough
Considering the scriptural archeologist is alive

Chu:
One level 0, but we got our asses kicked

Fishman:
If you want something done right, you have to do it yourself, then.

Pundit:
At one point, EVERYONE in the group had to do a luck check to survive, except Zeke.  Zeke twice took exactly enough damage to leave him unconscious.

Bill:
Damn

Fishman:
My hate for him burns with the strength of a hundred suns.

-----


Bill:
I've spent the last day thinking how to get out of this mess, still no good plan
Not that the one before was anywhere close to genius


Chu:
I think this is the first time you think about a plan before being in it

Bill
Done it before, you can appreciate the failures
And if previous results are any indication of the infinite possibilities, then everyone is probably dead

Morris:
Jump off the building
What could possibly go wrong?

Bill:
Everything
If you take into account that Nikos might always be watching

Chu:
He isn't watching, he is probably still trying to force the command crew ancient into committing a G.O.D related mistake. Classic Nikos.

Fishman:
We have to pray for a miracle. And by we I mean the asshole who put us in this situation. Ack'basha.

Ackbasha:
You misspelled Bill

Bill:
Do you know his name

Morris:
Don't worry, the Fish-man will come with something

Chu:
Fishman might thing of a way out.
think*


Fishman:
The fishman hates you all and hopes you die suffering.

Chu:
Ah, Classic Fishman.

Bill:
Bill is your friend, he knows your name

Fishman:
Which is....

Bill:
PM

Morris:
Wait, he has a name?!

Chu:
Wasn't it Gandolfo?

Fishman:
1) It was Gadolfo.
2) No.


Bill:
Gandolfo is a boatswine
Bill has a shit plan that might work


Ackbasha:
Yes. Fishman the fisherman fishman.

Bill:
Now good night

Fishman:
Yeah, you better run!

Bill:
Why?
Bill knows your name
He is your friend

Ackbasha:
He is nobody's friend
Well. Bob's. As dangerous and adict as Bill.

Bill:
And Nikos
Maybe
In a strange way


Fishman:
I REALLY wouldn't count on that.

Pundit:
By "this mess", you mean Bill having betrayed the whole party's location?

Ackbasha:
That's a regular thursday for Bill.

Fishman:
Don't blame Bill for this mess. Frankly it's our fault.
We should have taken into account that Bill would fuck up everything and acted accordingly.

Ackbasha:
I did
that's why Akbasha allowed him to do it.

Fishman:
Like move to another secure location instead of waiting there.
But you WANTED for him to fuck everything up.
It doesn't count.

Ackbasha:
I just let him be.

Fishman:
So what you're saying it that everything is your fault?
I agree.

Ackbasha:
Yes, but in a simpsons kind of way. "It's your fault for not being here to stop me from being an idiot"

Fishman:

Los simpsons El coco esta en la casa

You read my mind.
So we all are on the same page then? All this is Ack'basha's fault?
The citizens of Minotauria clearly think so.



Pundit:
There is no minotauria!!

Fishman:
Of course there is.
it's in our hearts.

Bill:
At least I get to talk to Pertinax

Fishman:
I can't wait to see how you screw that up

Bill:
Can't be worst that the time I killed the last ancient

Fishman:
Those were simpler times.

Newbie:
I am still thinking the 'avoid the dungeons' policy has somehow blew on our face and will end with us precisely in a dungeon

Chu:
That is was the plan
Bill though otherwise.

Fishman:
We are overthinking this. We'll probably massacre the minotaur swat team and be done with it.

Chu:
Oh yeah
You mean, I will massacre the minotaur swat team with my working hand.

Fishman:
And by we, I mean Ack'basha and Chu.
So, yeah.

Bill:
I will have a serious talk with Pertinax and this will be solved
Said no Bill ever

Fishman:
Sezerkan's gonna be SO pissed.

Bill:
He always is
Good thing I rolled max when I did the patron bond

Fishman:
And that explains EVERYTHING.

Chu:
Well, that means you have a good chance of doing that again.

Bill:
Bill was still in the galley for 6 months
The true problem is that Bill, for some strange reason, keeps on sparing Akbasha's life



Fishman:
That's not a problem Ack'basha has.
Unfortunately, it doesn't work.

Ackbasha:
And that's the reason why Akbasha spares Bill's life. It just doesn't work... yet.


Bill:
So you say it's some kind of unconscious  survival safety

Ackbasha:
there is nothing unconscious about Akbasha.

Fishman:
Except when he's unconscious.

Bill:
God thing Bill has -1 intelligence

Ackbasha:
Bill just doesn't appreciate how much Ackbasha has done for him. He was willing to add "recover Bill's philactery" as a side quest in his now abandoned crusade.

Bill:
Or it could just be to control him

Ackbasha:
Nah, he doesn't need the philactery for that.

Bill:
Whoever has the philactery controls Bill

Ackbasha:
It doesn't seems to be doing Sezerkhan any good.
Bill cannot be controled.

Chu:
Eh you call what is happening right now as control by sezrekan, Bills gut instict controls bill

Fishman:
Not even by himself.

Bill:
He always says that, but he loves Bill like a crappy cat

Fishman:
You keep pushing, and he might end up putting the cat to sleep.
This quest for the Librum has the flavor of an ultimatum.

Bill:
Sez tells me not to make it about killing Ackbasha then sends me out with him to get a book he know Ackbasha is going to try to stop me from getting
I guess Bill geta the scheming skills from Sez

Fishman:
Or lack of.

Bill:
Tamato tomato




That's it for today.  The last bit above is also a little preview of the shit that went down in our last DCC adventure. There'll be a campaign update for that shortly.

RPGPundit

Currently Smoking:  Lorenzetti Volcano + H&H's Chestnut

10 comments:

  1. You should make a book out of this and sell it. The banter between the players is top notch.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Eventually, I'll make a book out of it. Not the banter, but the setting that inspired it.

      Delete
    2. The banter in my opinion is the best bits. It what keeps me coming back.

      Delete
    3. I don't think I've ever quite had a group with as much of a unique comedic chemistry as the current DCC group has had for the last year or so.

      Delete
    4. That is why you need to use it. It is comedy gold.

      Delete
  2. when you do finally make a book out of this, I realize that with the number of PC deaths involved, doing write ups of all the characters would be nearly impossible, but would you at least include Bill?

    (or I suppose you could ask your players to contribute and do the write-ups)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We could potentially do this, yes. But a mere set of stats on paper does not, I think, really encapsulate Bill the Elf.

      Delete
    2. I was thinking more along the lines of a one page write up of the PC's motivations and such.

      Delete
    3. If there only where any motivations...

      Delete
    4. I think Bill was just a goofball semi-competent wizard/elf until the death of his brother, Ted. After that, it was like his "joker" moment and he turned into this incredibly dangerous anarchist type. He's not evil, he doesn't want to rule the world, he doesn't even necessarily want to destroy everything. He just does, everywhere he goes, because it is what he is now.

      Delete